And I really dont know what to do about it anymore. I just...want to curl up into a ball...and die. Just sleep forever. I keep hoping something horrible happens to me. And the thing is...I dont even really want to die. I want to be happy and responsible and successful but I dont know how, and I feel so fucking hopeless these days...I just...I cant...I dont know.
I need help. I know I need help...I just dont know how to get it...or accept it...or deal with it. I cant even just be good at dealing with being bad. I fucking suck at everything. Fucking misery. I hate complaining. I hate being the one sitting here bitching and moaning about my life. Poor fucking me, ok? I dont know.. Fuck this.
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